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Are you struggling to find a leadership style that works for you and your employees? A style you can feel comfortable with, lead with and have respect with. Start by taking a look at the leaders you admire, what about their style attracts you? My personal favorites have to do with leaders who have overcome challenges that we can not even begin to understand. Some of them are well-known (Nelson Mandela, Ghandi, or Martin Luther King) and some are known around the neighborhood or are in my family. Don’t try to imitate them – people will recognize immediately that it’s not you. However you can learn from them and adapt those learnings into your style.

Sounds great – but how do you do it? This will take some soul searching.

Start with your passion. Why do you do what you do? Are you happy with it? This may sound “fluffy” or “new age” but think about it.  You need to know what it is so you can share it and this will help you lead.  People are attracted to those who have a passion for what they are doing.  Just look at the examples cited above – could they have had a following if they weren’t passionate, outspoken or driven?

Passion is part of the answer – the next thing you need to look at is how you express it.  This has to be sincere and in a style that is comfortable to you – people can sense a fake. They will be forgiving if you are struggling to find the right words as long as you have good intentions.  At first this may take some time and it may feel awkward or coming off as insincere – keep at it until you find your voice, the one that feels natural to use.

Communication is key and people are more likely to listen if you communicate clearly. How do you communicate? Do people understand what you want, looking for or trying to achieve? If not, rephrase it a way that makes sense to them. Speak in a language your people understand.  For example – some of your employees may not know what EBITDA is, so before you start talking about it – explain it. Explain what it is, why it is important to them and why you track it, then let them ask questions. Answer their questions using situations they can relate to. For example: let’s use EBITDA again, explain the money coming in (sales) minus (expenses) equals EBITDA, if they are still unsure relate it to their paycheck. Money in (take home pay) minus expenses (household bills) equals EBITDA. Keep at it until you see that proverbial light bulb go off over their head. Only once they understand you, can they follow you and support you. You also need to explain this not only so it makes sense to them but how it relates to what they do.

Let’s not forget the leading by example part. If you are walking and talking what you are saying they are more likely to follow you. No one trusts a person who says one thing and does another. You know who the leaders you admire are, now take a look at those you don’t.  What about their style didn’t you like? Learn by not repeating the same mistakes.

Lastly, keep in mind that finding your leadership style does not mean you have to go easy on people, expect less of them or be friends with them. Actually it is the opposite.  The more you expect from them, the more you challenge them, the more they will respect you. Of course that does not give you the right to yell or belittle – again it is in the communication. Show and tell them you have the confidence in them and they can do it. People will see that you are being honest and sincere, therefore they will follow your lead.

Everyone has a great leader inside them, let it show!